rainy days and Mondays always get me down...
This always happens to me. I had a great weekend as usual. It was a nice long three day weekend that I spent hanging with my friends and my husband. Then, Sunday night rolls around. About 7:00 p.m., I start to get that crappy feeling. I start dreading the next day. Then I have a hard time falling asleep because I'm doing a mental check to see if I can find a reason not to go to work the next day. Does my throat feel even a tiny bit sore? Is my nose stuffy? Do I feel nauseous? Sometimes all the stressing actually makes me nauseous. Then I go sit on the cold bathroom tile and stare at the dust bunnies under the toilet hearing Sgt. Azzmunch's stupid voice droning on and on. I don't know what he's saying. Probably something really banal and boring. It's not what he says. It's how he says it...He sounds like the school teacher on Charlie Brown. Wa-wa-wah-wa-wa-wah-wah.
It's not that I hate my job. It's not even about hating the military. I've said it before and I'll say it again. The AF has been an invaluable part of my evolution as a human being. But it's just that I've moved past it. There is nothing here anymore that I look forward to learning.
The AF is about small minded people trying to smoosh you inside their ideas of what is right and wrong. It is about people with no potential to move beyond their comfort zone trying to make you feel guilty for reaching beyond yours. It is about imposing you beliefs however old and antiquated on whoever you are supervising. It's about bad leadership, bad ideas and bad attitudes.
I've been one of the lucky few who ended up with a job that affords me some outlet for my creativity. But I've outgrown my job and my coworkers and my rank and my environment. I'm just not happy anymore. In an attempt to give my career a shot in the arm I've volunteered to be UAC VP and be on the GC committee. But it's not enough. They start to see that you've volunteered and they just start trying to take more away from you. It's not enough that I give them every waking hour during the week. They want my weekends too.
I'm miserable here and I can't wait to be free.
It's not that I hate my job. It's not even about hating the military. I've said it before and I'll say it again. The AF has been an invaluable part of my evolution as a human being. But it's just that I've moved past it. There is nothing here anymore that I look forward to learning.
The AF is about small minded people trying to smoosh you inside their ideas of what is right and wrong. It is about people with no potential to move beyond their comfort zone trying to make you feel guilty for reaching beyond yours. It is about imposing you beliefs however old and antiquated on whoever you are supervising. It's about bad leadership, bad ideas and bad attitudes.
I've been one of the lucky few who ended up with a job that affords me some outlet for my creativity. But I've outgrown my job and my coworkers and my rank and my environment. I'm just not happy anymore. In an attempt to give my career a shot in the arm I've volunteered to be UAC VP and be on the GC committee. But it's not enough. They start to see that you've volunteered and they just start trying to take more away from you. It's not enough that I give them every waking hour during the week. They want my weekends too.
I'm miserable here and I can't wait to be free.
posted by saucybritches at
2/07/2005 01:20:00 PM
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